Ouch! That Hurt!

So, I cut myself on the ax. Not the literal ax, no, the delete button ax. It hurt when I deleted those 200 pages. I think I'm bleeding. 

But today, I started filling out the rest of my story. I have some scene ideas and one big background factor that is going to tie the whole thing together. My poor notebook, which was about full the first time I finished my manuscript, is now bursting at the seams and I am in need of a new one. 

So today I need to get a new notebook, finish my first scene (that's actually like two chapters in), write a review of Maeve Binchy's Heart and Soul, change a million dirty diapers and do some laundry. 

Update: This scene is giving me a headache. I've written 1,300 crappy words today and I know I won't end up keeping half of them, if any. I am trying to recapture the voice and mood of this story but its eluding me. No one said diving back in would be easy. But it should be.

Austen Heroine ...

Taking a break while cutting down trees (figuratively of course, see previous post) and I ran across Which Austen Heroine Are You? quiz. Quick, fun and for me, dead on. I hope. 

Take the Quiz here!

Cutting Off The Dead Limbs

This past January we experienced a mega ice storm. A half inch of bone chilling ice covered the roads, the power lines, our driveway (I love sliding down the hill to the mailbox) and our trees. I woke up the next morning to see half our very large pear tree laying across our fence. It had split almost entirely down the middle. That afternoon my poor husband got out in the cold and doctored the tree. It looked so forlorn with half of it gone and unfortunately, we can now see straight into our backyard neighbor's kitchen (which means they can see into ours and my baby boy's butt when he gets a bath in the sink). We were sure the tree would have to come down in the spring. How could it survive the ice damage? 

Well spring is here and as I sit at my kitchen window and look out, the pear tree is alive with green, green leaves and tiny but beautiful sprigs of white flowers. Sure, half of it is still missing but I can see a little tiny branch making it's way out. The tree has survived and it's here to stay. 

Like the tree, my current manuscript has suffered some damage. A rejection, the tearing apart of chapters, the deletion of characters and most importantly I (oh God, deep breath) have decided to chop off the entire last half. Yeah, I'm doing it. Because it needs to be done. The third and fourth acts are like those dead limbs - covered in ice, black and deadened - and they need to be removed, put out to the curb for the city to come and pick up. It hurt to do it - to literally highlight 200 pages and hit delete - but wow do I feel good about it. It's like getting a really good haircut and your head just feels so much lighter. The first half of my book was so good, I am so proud of it. When I looked at the second half, the spirit of the book had dimmed. My characters didn't seem like the same people and my voice was just off. But I've fixed that. Now I am going to go back into those first two acts, widen them out, add scenes, people, places and make the book into what I originally envisioned. Make it LIVE. 

I feel good.

Sometimes we need to sit back, identify the dead branches and cut them down. Sure, we're left with half a tree, but that's half a tree ready to grow. 

Starting Over Again ...

The past few months have been nothing short of life-changing for me. There were fantastic changes, like giving life to a beautiful baby boy. And there were not so good changes like losing my job and the recent death of my grandmother - a woman I now realize I thought I knew, even judged at times, but probably didn't know a damn thing about her really. All these changes - a thousand more little ones too - have combined to slow me down and I haven't had the time, energy or creativity to continue writing. Add to that the rejection of a manuscript I am really proud of and you could say I dropped out of what I love doing. But now I think I am ready to come back. But there are some hurdles with that. 

The first - I am a different person than I was six months ago. My world view has been altered over the course of a few short months (although let me tell you, those first three felt like a LIFETIME. I don't remember Christmas ... or New Years ... or January ...). So returning to an old manuscript, I see it with completely different eyes. I don't like what I see in most spots. 

Secondly - Time: I don't have it. I've been robbed. Well, been robbed of long stretches of time. For now I have perhaps 20-45 minutes at a time to sit down and just think, let alone write. This forces me to work quickly and I don't work well under pressure.

Third - I've been out of the romance writing loop for awhile and it seems like in the time I was gone, publishing took a completely different turn. Perhaps I am wrong but I feel as though (from just a few days of surfing my favorite sites) romance has turned from historicals and veered directly toward contemporaries. Bummer for me since I have several half finished historical novels going on. 

All this combined means I have to completely re-invent myself and my writing style. So welcome back to me, now start all over lady.

Out of Curiousity

One, did I spell that right? Oh well. 

Two ... are you more or less likely to pick up a book that is written in first person? Personally I enjoy IP but I also miss the perspectives of others in the story. I am debating writing first person and I am wobbling on that decision. One good argument could sway me either way. 

Tuesday Teasers

Today's Teaser is from Maeve Binchy's Heart and Soul. 

She has never stayed late like this before, so she saw them putting candles in bottles and watched the great romantic shadows flickering on the walls.

Teaser Tuesday is hosted by Should be Reading:

• Grab your current read.
• Let the book fall open to a random page.
• Share with us two (2) “teaser” sentences from that page, somewhere between lines 7 and 12.
• You also need to share the title of the book that you’re getting your “teaser” from … that way people can have some great book recommendations if they like the teaser you’ve given!
• Please avoid spoilers!

Unexpected Delights - Mailbox Monday

Today I am baby-free and job-free and so I thought I would sit down and READ. It's been a long time since I could devote an entire day to just being lazy and today I am going to take full advantage. Luckily I have two lovely books just waiting to be cracked open. First up is:

I am an avid Meg-fan and I can't imagine why I haven't read this book before. But she's funny and smart and it's a quick read, just the way I like them. And BONUS, it was in the bargain bin for $4.

And then, someone new:

The back blurb sounded funny. A baker who has to bake her ex's wedding cake and then discovers she has the magic ability to make fabulous cakes full of revenge. I like it! Also, Ms. Madison has a cute blog at: http://www.tracymadison.com/blog/index.php

It's going to be a happy day!

P.S. I miss my kid!

If I Could Be Snarky ...

It's really not in me to be nasty. I mean, I have my moments, but overall, I think I am a pretty nice person. But once in awhile (ok, at least once a day) I think something really mean and it makes me giggle. A nasty little giggle about that girl's short skirt, that frat boy taking a spill in the parking lot, or the middle-aged guy in the caddy getting a ticket. Do I feel good about laughing? Not really. But IF I did and IF I were mean enough, I think I would start a blog about being mean. I've even come up with some names.

Love, Anonymous

Bite Me

Laughing Out Loud

Snark - The Right Way

If you started a "mean" blog, what would you call it?

Disclaimer: I haven't actually checked to see if these names are available and I claim no attachment to them. 

IS ANYONE LISTENING?

I'm not one to usually post on these sorts of things, but I watched this news story and it just got to me.

ABC NEWS

And the video on YouTube ... Is Anybody Listening?

A Few Random Things About Me

My sister sent me an email awhile ago while she was “bored at work”. In it contained 25 random things about her. I was thoroughly entertained and thought I’d like to try it. Now that I actually have time (the kid is at his grandparents’ house for a few days), here I go. And by the way, I am not going to make it to 25.

Despite being an avid reader, I just got a library card last week after living in my town for ten years.

I am addicted to HGTV. My favorite show is Renovation Realities because I like laughing at other peoples’ mishaps.

I hate lending my books because I never get them back.

I love road trips.

When I’m on road trips, I love looking at the road signs and wondering about the names of towns and where they came from.

I love, against my better judgment, American Idol.

I hate socks.

Sometimes I wish I were more interesting. Other times I am quite content to be very quiet.

I hate snow after December.

If I were a flower, I think I’d be a morning glory.

If I were an animal I would like to be a house cat. (See what I mean about wanting to be more interesting?)

I recently realized, after all these years, that my mom was right about most things.

When you fall down, it really is better if there is someone else there to see it. Because crying is better when you laugh too.

I cannot name my favorite song, book, color, movie or TV show.

I want to live in a lighthouse. 

Review ~ The Godmother by Carrie Adams

Nothing scares Tessa King more than the thought she will never have children. It doesn’t matter how good her life is, and it is, it never feels good enough. She has four godchildren and dozens of friends, yet love eludes her. She knows how good a mother she could be, if only she had the chance. And then one terrible day she does, and Tessa learns firsthand that life on the other side of that white picket fence is more complicated than she ever could have imagined.

Heartwarming, funny, and genuine, The Godmother speaks to anyone who has wondered about the next step and reminds us that happily-ever-after is just the beginning of the story.

I picked up this book after circling it in the bookstore for months. It features some of my favorite themes: not-so-spectacular singledom, London, huge life changes and enduring friendship.  It is the last, that enduring friendship, that made this book special.

Tessa King is a likeable enough character. She thinks she’s had enough of the single life and wants to settle down. All of her friends have entered that next stage of life: marriage, marriage with kids, and single parenthood. After a scary few months of being stalked by her boss, Tessa takes off for a much-needed vacation in India and returns with the feeling that her life is missing something. That “something” she concludes, must be children and a man to have them with. Or is it?

Tessa’s world revolves around her friends and her friends’ children to whom she is godmother. She spends most of the book floundering about trying to figure out who she wants to be and resolutely ignoring the real problems her friends face. They say she has the perfect life, but to Tessa, the perfect life consists of what her friends have. She only scratches at the surface of their lives (as they do to her). It takes a series of crises, involving her friends, for Tessa to really see her friends’ lives for what they are. And when she does, Tessa begins to question what she really wants. She has a few false starts – mostly an ill-fated almost-affair with her married best friend but thankfully pulls back from the edge just before she falls.    

At the end of the book I was left with the vague feeling that Tessa really hasn’t learned what she wants and there are lessons waiting to be taught. However, Ms. Adams’ next book, The Stepmother, features the continuing adventures of Tessa. Let’s hope she finds what she is looking for.

Things I Liked

~ I like Al and Claudia’s role in the book: the measure to which Tessa wants to be. I also liked that the obvious solution, the easy way out, wasn’t taken by these two.

~ I enjoyed the writing style. The book read easily and I found it hard to put down.  Ms. Adams is heavy on the foreshadowing which I enjoy.

Things I Didn’t Like

~ I wasn’t so keen on Ben, Tessa’s best friend with whom she has some romantic history. I felt he took advantage of her friendship and Tessa let him.

Rating: B (could be higher if I am satisfied with Tessa at the end of The Stepmother)

Additional Info

~ Published ~ 2007

~ Price ~ Trade $14.95

~ Next Out ~ The Stepmother (March 2009)

Today's Teaser is from Ellen Baker's Keeping The House. 

Mrs. Fryt shook her head. "I'll never forget the sound of her screaming, that June day when she got the telegram. Enough to curdle cheese, that sound."

Teaser Tuesday is hosted by Should be Reading:

• Grab your current read.
• Let the book fall open to a random page.
• Share with us two (2) “teaser” sentences from that page, somewhere between lines 7 and 12.
• You also need to share the title of the book that you’re getting your “teaser” from … that way people can have some great book recommendations if they like the teaser you’ve given!
• Please avoid spoilers!